Suddenly i miss my dad.... miss him so much. He's a good man. Good by the moral of this world system. Work so hard to support his family, even when he retired from his job, he still got a job as a dish washer to supplement the family's income. Every night when he come back from work, he would share about the hardship of his work.. but he never complained, he is just like that... never hear him complain about anything... he just take everything in his stride. With his hardship, he had sucessfully see all of us complete the studies and path we want to take. But i am just sad that he didn't see the success i am enjoying now. Everytime when i'm down with sorrow, my heart just call out to him because i know that when he is alive, he is the only one who is standing by me without any request of appreciation or "reward". He is there selflessly for his family.
Every year when we go to his tomb during his death anniversary... many thoughts just went throught my mind and heart... happy moments.. sad ones... memorable ones... and the very precious image of him smiling during his battle with cancer. I won't let that image fade away.. its too precious to let go.
One of the most regrettable things i did is to go to East Timor during his last few months in this world... and when i came back to see him... thank God, he passed away the next day.... family members told me that he is holding on to see me... and when he saw me, he knows its time to let go.... Well, to me its a good thing as for all his life he is suffering on earth... working very hard.... never had a good time for himself. I know he is with God now.... resting in HIS arms... getting his deserved rest....
I miss him....
Thursday, February 03, 2005
Sunday, January 30, 2005
life like dat ah...
Hi.. i'm 27....errrr oh ya, now is a new year already, which means i'm 28 this year!!! Oh my gosh! Didn't really accomplished anything Great!!!! no, i'm not President of Singapore yet, didn't own the car of my dreams yet, not the top 10 richest man yet. But come to think of it, i didn't even try to achieve them too. Prehaps i'm lazy, or not daring, or i'm just moving the flow of my life effortlessly. Am i not satisfied with my present life? A BIG NO!!!
So far, even though i'm not rich and powerful but i'm living comfortably and happy... many others in the other part of the world are still struggling with life.. trying to make ends meet. Yes... i really have to Thank GOd for all these things.
Having been married for 2 years... a nice career which allows me to fly around the world for free... a relation with Jesus that brought unspeakable peace n joy in my heart... what more can i ask for?
But somehow deep in my heart, i know that i want to do something GREAT. Something daring.. something out of the ordinary... am i adventerous? Not quite but i willing to try out things... I don't want to just sail past my life without accomplishing anything. Thats why i volunteer myself for the East Timor peacekeeping mission during my Navy days... but all things come with some sacrifice.... i didn't managed to have some good quality time with my dad before my hero... DAD passed away in hospital losing the battle to cancer. But i know i will get to see him again in heaven... he believed in Jesus before i left for East timor. Yes... thats one of the saddest period of my life. I missed him terribly. No one on earth will stand by me like what my dad will, not even my wife i guess... i know i can confide in him in whatever problems i faced. He wanted to live to see his grandchildren come into this world.. but we have disappointed him. :(
If u are reading my blog... you will noticed that there are no specific direction in my sharing of my life... i jus write whatever comes into my mind... guess thats one of my minimum effort in not trying to conform to this world... where everybody jus follow rules and regulations. Everybody become so robotic... jus following the motion and system...
Do keep coming back to this page for more of whats going on in my mind... hopefully i can find someone in this world who thinks like i do......... someone who is trapped in a body who is too trapped in the world's system.
Break through the system... i do. Watch out world!!
So far, even though i'm not rich and powerful but i'm living comfortably and happy... many others in the other part of the world are still struggling with life.. trying to make ends meet. Yes... i really have to Thank GOd for all these things.
Having been married for 2 years... a nice career which allows me to fly around the world for free... a relation with Jesus that brought unspeakable peace n joy in my heart... what more can i ask for?
But somehow deep in my heart, i know that i want to do something GREAT. Something daring.. something out of the ordinary... am i adventerous? Not quite but i willing to try out things... I don't want to just sail past my life without accomplishing anything. Thats why i volunteer myself for the East Timor peacekeeping mission during my Navy days... but all things come with some sacrifice.... i didn't managed to have some good quality time with my dad before my hero... DAD passed away in hospital losing the battle to cancer. But i know i will get to see him again in heaven... he believed in Jesus before i left for East timor. Yes... thats one of the saddest period of my life. I missed him terribly. No one on earth will stand by me like what my dad will, not even my wife i guess... i know i can confide in him in whatever problems i faced. He wanted to live to see his grandchildren come into this world.. but we have disappointed him. :(
If u are reading my blog... you will noticed that there are no specific direction in my sharing of my life... i jus write whatever comes into my mind... guess thats one of my minimum effort in not trying to conform to this world... where everybody jus follow rules and regulations. Everybody become so robotic... jus following the motion and system...
Do keep coming back to this page for more of whats going on in my mind... hopefully i can find someone in this world who thinks like i do......... someone who is trapped in a body who is too trapped in the world's system.
Break through the system... i do. Watch out world!!
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